Today's blog has nothing to do with weight loss but I am going to blog it anyway because it may be helpful to a lot of people in relationships. I am a certified hypnotherapist and over the past decade I have created a method of emotional erase called the DEEP Release Clear Mind Process. I can take virtually any highly charged emotion from a past emotional/trauma experience and erase the charge and replace the feelings of the event/circumstance with a state of peace and calm and I can do this in a matter of minutes with the DEEP process.
Over the past year I have seen a number of clients who have had the experience of a spouse who has cheated on them. Betrayal, lies, deceit, infidelity, unfaithfulness, adultery can dramatically shatter any relationship when the reality of the affair is brought into the light of day.
The most common place for cheating to take hold is the workplace, the play space (sports, the club), kids school functions/sporting events, a neighbor, friend of spouse. Really anywhere that a man and woman can meet and spend time getting to know each other and become "friends."
The explosion in the number of affairs over the past couple of years has accelerated tenfold with the advent of the smart phone and text messaging. The smart phone text messaging affair starts off innocently enough with simple chatting as the two new "friends" get to know one another now, with greater intimacy and communication than they could have ever otherwise experienced from the old fashioned direct face to face or even phone call conversations. The chat eventually leads to flirt texting that excites this new budding relationship and catapults it from a simple non emotional acquaintance/friendship into something much much more. Soon these new "friends" are spending all their time engrossed in intimate text message conversations. Flirting and sharing their thoughts and feelings with instant texts that grow more intimate and more sexual and more emotional by the day. Very soon this "friendly relationship" gives birth to a sexual chemistry with physical attraction and contact and heightened infatuation. The smart phone chatting becomes compulsive and as the intensity of the chats turn increasingly more romantic and sexual, the relationship explodes into a full blown highly charged romance. The smart phone messaging is the vehicle that introduces a steady stream of highly charged endorphin loaded chat communications into the hearts and minds of these now new lovers, just as a syringe brings heroin into the blood stream of an addict. The chats begin early in the morning and continue throughout the day and into the late night with an obsession and desire akin to one hooked on an addictive drug.
This blog is about alerting and educating the innocent partner on what to look for in a potentially cheating spouse. First thing to be aware of is their time away from you, where are they going and what are they doing? Do you really know? Do they keep their smart phone close to their side at all times, day and night? Are they always texting? Do they allow you access to their texts, to their email and to their phone logs on their cell phone? Do you also have free access to their cell phone carrier account so you can see who they call and who they are texting, just in case they delete all their smart phone texts? If you are a bit suspicious you want to become proactive and become the detective, it is your right to know who your spouse associates and communicates with and what they are doing during the day. Always trust yet verify is what I would advise, especially in todays high tech world of smart phone communication, things have changed and believe it or not, chatting can lead to cheating, especially in the emotionally vulnerable.
Remember I said that many affairs begin innocently enough with a friendship of sorts that grows and matures into an infatuation and full blown affair. Text messaging is today, responsible for a new kind of relationship to immediately blossom between two people who otherwise would have never thought twice about the other, producing highly charged emotional/sexual relationships in a short period of time. These "forbidden" affairs flourish like never before due to the intimacy and constant communication of the text messages 24/7. A guy who could not bring himself to express his romantic desires to a woman face to face verbally, becomes a modern day Don Juan with a barrage of sexy and caring text message seductions as his new "friend" responds eagerly and addictively and instantly with her heartfelt texts of love and romance. The brain is now fired up with strong "love" chemicals like never before and the anticipation of another love text becomes a neurochemical endorphin bursting obsession. Our society has never seen the likes of this before and there is very little press about the explosion of "text message affairs." I predict we will soon be reading about text message affairs or cheating text message addictions and you can say someday that you read it here first. In the past, statistics told us that 25% of married women and 45% of married men cheat. Todays stats I believe will be alarming when new statistics are tallied and reported.
Another little tip, if your spouse has a "friend" of the opposite sex, who they say is "just a friend," do not innocently believe it. Generally "just a friend" is "not" just a friend, investigate it, check the texts and the phone logs and the emails and the cell phone provider records and always trust yet verify, especially when their cell phone is glued to their hip and you do not have free and unfettered access to their phone, email passwords and to their phone carrier records as you rightly should. Also understand that into today's high tech world of throw away phones, many affair couples carry an extra phone, if you suspect, look for that second phone.
With the work I do, I see clients who need my help with the high stress associated with the feelings and the experience of betrayal and infidelity. The DEEP Release Clear Mind Process is effective at reducing and releasing the highly charged stressors of this painful experience for the betrayed partner.
Until next time, Dr. Mark Doyle
Over the past year I have seen a number of clients who have had the experience of a spouse who has cheated on them. Betrayal, lies, deceit, infidelity, unfaithfulness, adultery can dramatically shatter any relationship when the reality of the affair is brought into the light of day.
The most common place for cheating to take hold is the workplace, the play space (sports, the club), kids school functions/sporting events, a neighbor, friend of spouse. Really anywhere that a man and woman can meet and spend time getting to know each other and become "friends."
The explosion in the number of affairs over the past couple of years has accelerated tenfold with the advent of the smart phone and text messaging. The smart phone text messaging affair starts off innocently enough with simple chatting as the two new "friends" get to know one another now, with greater intimacy and communication than they could have ever otherwise experienced from the old fashioned direct face to face or even phone call conversations. The chat eventually leads to flirt texting that excites this new budding relationship and catapults it from a simple non emotional acquaintance/friendship into something much much more. Soon these new "friends" are spending all their time engrossed in intimate text message conversations. Flirting and sharing their thoughts and feelings with instant texts that grow more intimate and more sexual and more emotional by the day. Very soon this "friendly relationship" gives birth to a sexual chemistry with physical attraction and contact and heightened infatuation. The smart phone chatting becomes compulsive and as the intensity of the chats turn increasingly more romantic and sexual, the relationship explodes into a full blown highly charged romance. The smart phone messaging is the vehicle that introduces a steady stream of highly charged endorphin loaded chat communications into the hearts and minds of these now new lovers, just as a syringe brings heroin into the blood stream of an addict. The chats begin early in the morning and continue throughout the day and into the late night with an obsession and desire akin to one hooked on an addictive drug.
This blog is about alerting and educating the innocent partner on what to look for in a potentially cheating spouse. First thing to be aware of is their time away from you, where are they going and what are they doing? Do you really know? Do they keep their smart phone close to their side at all times, day and night? Are they always texting? Do they allow you access to their texts, to their email and to their phone logs on their cell phone? Do you also have free access to their cell phone carrier account so you can see who they call and who they are texting, just in case they delete all their smart phone texts? If you are a bit suspicious you want to become proactive and become the detective, it is your right to know who your spouse associates and communicates with and what they are doing during the day. Always trust yet verify is what I would advise, especially in todays high tech world of smart phone communication, things have changed and believe it or not, chatting can lead to cheating, especially in the emotionally vulnerable.
Remember I said that many affairs begin innocently enough with a friendship of sorts that grows and matures into an infatuation and full blown affair. Text messaging is today, responsible for a new kind of relationship to immediately blossom between two people who otherwise would have never thought twice about the other, producing highly charged emotional/sexual relationships in a short period of time. These "forbidden" affairs flourish like never before due to the intimacy and constant communication of the text messages 24/7. A guy who could not bring himself to express his romantic desires to a woman face to face verbally, becomes a modern day Don Juan with a barrage of sexy and caring text message seductions as his new "friend" responds eagerly and addictively and instantly with her heartfelt texts of love and romance. The brain is now fired up with strong "love" chemicals like never before and the anticipation of another love text becomes a neurochemical endorphin bursting obsession. Our society has never seen the likes of this before and there is very little press about the explosion of "text message affairs." I predict we will soon be reading about text message affairs or cheating text message addictions and you can say someday that you read it here first. In the past, statistics told us that 25% of married women and 45% of married men cheat. Todays stats I believe will be alarming when new statistics are tallied and reported.
Another little tip, if your spouse has a "friend" of the opposite sex, who they say is "just a friend," do not innocently believe it. Generally "just a friend" is "not" just a friend, investigate it, check the texts and the phone logs and the emails and the cell phone provider records and always trust yet verify, especially when their cell phone is glued to their hip and you do not have free and unfettered access to their phone, email passwords and to their phone carrier records as you rightly should. Also understand that into today's high tech world of throw away phones, many affair couples carry an extra phone, if you suspect, look for that second phone.
With the work I do, I see clients who need my help with the high stress associated with the feelings and the experience of betrayal and infidelity. The DEEP Release Clear Mind Process is effective at reducing and releasing the highly charged stressors of this painful experience for the betrayed partner.
Until next time, Dr. Mark Doyle
No comments:
Post a Comment